Confessions of a Curious Bookseller
Elizabeth Green
Advertisement
WE’RE HIRING!
In West Philadelphia, steps from Clark Park and the Green Line, sits the most renowned and beloved bookstore in the city: the Curious Cat Book Emporium. And as luck would have it, we’re hiring!
Full-time assistance needed for the upcoming holidays (and beyond). Duties: Stocking shelves, counting inventory, greeting customers, answering phones, tidying up, running the register, smiling, and being a rock star! Must not be allergic to cats. Must like cats. (I will know if you are pretending!) Pay is fair. Sorry, no benefits. EOE.
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Sat, Nov 3, 2018 at 10:20 PM
To: Kyle Krazinsky
Subject: Application for employment
Dear Kyle,
Congratulations! You have been selected for the new role of cashier/tech support at the Curious Cat Book Emporium! Please arrive Monday, November 5 at 8 a.m. to begin your shift. Along with a smile and a willingness to make a difference, please wear jeans and a nice shirt or sweater (it can be drafty in here) and shoes with strong toe protection. As I stated in the interview, you will be lifting!
Before I forget, the store opens at 9:30 a.m. I ask my employees to arrive thirty minutes early, but I would like you to arrive at 8 a.m. to assist with the register’s computer as it has been freezing up lately. Also, my phone doesn’t ring anymore when people call me. It’s fine if it’s my mother, but if it’s something important, I’d like to know!
Congratulations!
Fawn, Owner
phillysmallbiz.com
Mon, Nov 5, 2018
Top Review—The Curious Cat Book Emporium
I thought there would be a poetry section? I came in looking for some Charles Bukowski. If you have a poetry section, it’s not well marked. I couldn’t find it last time I was in.
—Jiancheng P.
phillysmallbiz.com
Mon, Nov 5, 2018
Dear Jiancheng P.,
We in fact do have a poetry section! It is on the second floor by the historical fiction. Unfortunately I have only four full shelves of it, but I always found that the quality of poetry should overshadow the quantity. Don’t you agree? We have Emily Dickinson, Wallace Stevens, Pablo Neruda, and Alfred, Lord Tennyson to name a few. I apologize, for we do not carry Charles Bukowski, as you requested in your PSB review. Do you know how PSB works? I only ask because you shouldn’t give us one heart simply because we aren’t carrying the book you were looking for. Do return and I will personally show you the poetry section, though most likely Charles will not be there. He is far too edgy to be tucked between William Blake and Emily Dickinson. Imagine the conversation! Oddly, I do have Allen Ginsberg—a fact I had forgotten because I borrowed the book to read one day and never returned it. “A Supermarket in California” is probably my favorite poem. Have you read it?
Fawn, Owner, The Curious Cat Book Emporium
From: Sam Asimov
Sent: Tue, Nov 6, 2018 at 5:08 PM
To: Fawn Birchill, Staff
Subject: New Bookstore Opening
Hi Fawn,
It looks like a new bookstore is moving in down the street. Do you know anything about this?
Sam
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Tue, Nov 6, 2018 at 6:17 PM
To: Sam Asimov, Staff
Re: New Bookstore Opening
Dear Staff,
Yes, I am aware of this and have been for many months. By no means will this change anything. I cannot press this enough—we will see no changes, and there is no reason to panic. In fact, this may be an excellent boon for us, as it will help to heighten people’s awareness of the importance of books and perhaps spark interest in people who have never before been readers, ultimately bringing them to us. I assure you this is not a negative development. Furthermore, I plan on going over and introducing myself to the staff as soon as they are up and running. Here, I must make my supposed enemy my friend and see if we can even work together somehow.
Stiff upper lip,
Fawn, Owner
phillysmallbiz.com
Tue, Nov 6, 2018
Top Review—The Curious Cat Book Emporium
It took me twenty minutes to find the book I was looking for and when I found it, it was in the travel section. I must ask: Why was Upton Sinclair’s The Jungle in the travel section?? They know that it’s a novel, right?
—Alex S.
phillysmallbiz.com
Tue, Nov 6, 2018
Dear Alex S.,
I am so glad you were able to find the book you needed; however, I am sorry that it took you so long to find it. I am perplexed as to why you did not reach out to me or to one of my many employees for assistance. I purposefully hire people who are not intimidating creatures, so you should have no trouble approaching them for help. The fact that you found The Jungle in the travel section is a fault of one of my employees, and I do thank you for bringing it to my attention. I always strive to hire people who are well read, but we can’t have perfection all the time. A person who hasn’t read The Jungle might look at it and think it is perhaps a study on the flora and fauna of, say, Borneo, and not, as we know, a horribly depressing novel about poor Lithuanian immigrants coming to Chicago and butchering animals all day. I will have to tell my employees that Upton Sinclair was not, in fact, another Bill Bryson but a novelist and does not belong tucked beside The Adventures of Lewis and Clark. How fortuitous then that you thought to look in the travel section at all. You are either a detective or a skilled peruser, or you are spinning me quite a yarn. I give you the benefit of the doubt and think that you love perusing and so came upon it by happy accident. Sometimes that is how the greatest books are found.