How Not to Drown in a Glass of Water (7)

So yes, when I felt the pain, I tried to wait until I secured the insurance. My insurance went away when the factory went away. But when I say I felt the pain, I couldn’t wear anything without the elastic because my stomach was inflated. I couldn’t wait anymore.

I found a doctor who said if I make the down payment I can pay every month a little bit. So I made the down payment and now I pay every month for the operation. But don’t worry, I applied to see if El Obama will pay the bill for me. I hope.

The operation, the doctor said, was only going to take a few hours, and only a few days to recover. Most people would take many days off, but I came to see you anyways. And even if the doctor said somebody had to pick me up in the hospital, I told nobody about the cyst.

I did it all by myself. That’s how incredible I am.

When the doctor asked if somebody was coming to pick me up, I said yes, that they will come to me soon.

My fingers were shaking like this. My legs too. The pain in my stomach. Ay, it hurt, you have no idea! More than I thought. But I collected my things to go home.

But this gringa nurse chased me. Miss! Miss! ?Esperah! ?Noh puede salida!

You can’t tell me what to do, that’s what I wanted to say.

The policy, the nurse said, swinging her ponytail like Fidel does his tail when I enter the apartment of La Vieja Caridad. The nurse told me to sit and wait or I vomit or faint.

Can I teléfono familia for you? she asked.

I’m fine thank you, I said, even if my stomach had me blind.

Lo sientoh, Ms. Romero, but you must be accompanyamente. Sienta in sala, she said.

Bathroom, please?

She showed me where the bathroom was. Next to the exit. When she turned her back to me, I escaped and got in a taxi.

Look, I’m not someone to bother people. No way. Everyone is busy with their problems. They can’t take time off to pick me up from the hospital. So I don’t bother people.

Everything hurt, but I left that hospital with my head high.

That poor taxi driver was so worried about me.

He asked, Where to?

I swear to you, I couldn’t remember where I lived. My mind went to zero.

Miss, you OK?

Fort Washington, I said.

I had to fight to not vomit. Everything made me feel sick. The vibration of the car. The smell of the seats. I felt so bad. Ay, Dios mío. I vomited on the seat and on the glass between the driver and me. But fortunately I hadn’t eaten anything that day so the mess was not big.

Miss! Miss!

He tried to stop the car but there was a lot of traffic. Because I am strong, I reached to open both windows to get some air. And the cold air felt good. Then I cleaned up my mess. In my bag I always have napkins, the dry ones and the wet ones. I even carry plastic bags for emergencies like this.

Write that down: Cara Romero is always prepared.

I take you back to the hospital, he said.

No, I’m fine, I said.

I park. I help you, OK?

No, please. Fort Washington.

That doesn’t happen every day, you know? A person you don’t know, with his own problems, offering to help? When we arrived in my building, he got out of the car to open the door. I stepped out of the taxi and, with all the strength left in me, stood up. And I smiled. Like I told you, I’d rather die than bother a person. I gave him a good tip. When he looked in the back seat, I could tell he was impressed. There was no sign of me left in the car.

I cannot tell you how I walked up the stairs. Of course, the elevator was broken that day. That night I told La Vieja Caridad I could not make her dinner or walk Fidel. The next day, Hernán came for a coffee and he talked and talked and I listened to him complain about his job in the hospital. ángela brought some food that was going bad in the refrigerator. But did she notice my condition? Of course not. Her eyes always in the mirror. The phone always in the hand.

Lulú did notice that I took very little sips of the wine. That nothing was cooking on the stove. That the window in the kitchen was closed. I always leave it open, even on the most cold days, because I have a fire burning inside of me. But that day I was cold in the bones.

What do you have? she asked.

I’m just tired, I said.

I don’t need people saying to me that everything will be OK. Of course I’ll be OK. What other choice do I have? Who has the luxury of having someone to take care of them? Maybe only my sister ángela, who married a man like Hernán.

Let me give you some advice, fall for the man who loves you more than you love him.

Do you have a good man in your life? No? You should secure someone while you are still young. ángela did this and look how good she has it. Hernán takes care of everything. The food, the children, and her.

It’s not so easy to find a good companion. In this age, not so easy. I prefer to be alone than in bad company. So if I can do things on my own, I do.

Lulú understands me. Hours later, she brought me a sopa de pollo, with arroz, not fideos, the way I like it. And a big thermos of tea made with ginger, turmeric, garlic, and honey.

If I had told Lulú that I had gone to get the operation without saying anything to her, she’d be angry.

But she’s the same like me. Three years ago, she had a pain in the tooth that had her chewing only on one side. Maybe she could trick everybody else, but not me. This pain lasted for weeks. She could not get the root canal fast because she didn’t have insurance and had to save money to pay for it. I, too, had pain in the teeth. But I went to the dentist to fix it, even if now I pay every month a little bit, because I don’t want to be old without teeth.