Forever You're Mine (MINE #4)(9)

I don’t use drugs, my dreams are frightening enough.

~M.C. Escher





Pops of gun fire rape the deafening silence while flashes of light mar my vision.

I can’t move.

I can’t breathe.

I know what will happen if I do. I can feel the imminent doom and the promise it brings. I search for the courage to turn the corner, but I can’t f*cking do it. I know what will happen if I do. My gut twists with nausea, but it evaporates when I spot a group of savages less than ten yards away.

Crouching in place, I line the site of my rifle and pick them off one by one.

Pop.

Pop.

Pop.

Protect my brothers.

That’s my only mission. I find a calming breath as eerie silence descends once more, waiting with suppressed terror for the inevitable to happen. But before the demon can defeat me once more, a cloak of darkness envelopes me, taking me away from my tortured hell.

Then I hear her cry my name as brilliant light invades the darkness. “Cannon.”

She sounds like an angel.

I shuffle around in the blinding light, reaching my hands out for purchase of something. Anything that will help guide me to her.

“Cannon!” Panic knots in my throat. Her voice is farther away than it was before, fainter.

I begin to run. Where? I have no idea because I can’t see. The light is too bright. Then suddenly, I’m falling.

Flying.

Jolted awake, my heart pummeled inside my chest like a goddamn jackhammer. Sweat covered my face as my eyes struggle to adjust to the unforgiving sunlight pouring through my window. Checking the time, I rolled over with a defeated sigh.

Fuck.

I’d never had a dream shift directions like that. They were all either dark and terrifying or complete darkness.

I quickly decided complete darkness was what I preferred. Because reliving the past or losing Cora both hurt like a motherf*cker. Even if it was just a dream.

Something had shifted between us. In the two years we’d been friends I’d come to her rescue many times, but never once had I actually wanted to save her. I didn’t deserve her, but that damn sure didn’t stop me from wanting her.

And when did that change?

I knew I was no better for her than him. I certainly wasn’t capable of caring for her the way she should be cared for. The only thing I could offer her was comfort in the way of pleasure, and even I knew something so shallow would ruin what we had. Our friendship was important to me.

Cora was important to me.

When I picked her up last night, I could tell she’d been crying. The bastard hurt her again. I wanted to go up to his room and pound his face in, but I didn’t say a word. All I wanted to do was kiss her tears away. The thought scared the shit of me.

She crashed on my couch while I lay awake for hours, wondering what it would be like to hold her. But something so beautiful and sweet could never be mine. I was lucky enough to be her friend…I wasn’t stupid enough to think I could ever have more.

When I returned from dropping her off at home, I hit the bench hard. I thought for sure lifting weights would relieve all my pent up frustration and quiet some of these urges, but two hours later and I was still tense all over and my dick wouldn’t let the f*ck up. After I rubbed one out, I crashed…my mind and heart overloaded with far too many emotions.

I climbed in the shower to get ready for work, trying desperately to tame the ridiculous hard-on staring me in the face. Maybe I could hit up Alexis before I went in.

Yeah…that’s exactly what I need.

I could hear my phone vibrating in my jeans on the floor when I got out. I fished for my cell, letting go of an exasperating sigh.

Shit.

I didn’t want to answer, but I couldn’t put it off any longer.

“Hey, Dad,”

“Son, we’ve been worried sick. Where the hell have you been?”

Pissed and worried, not a good way to start a conversation I’d been avoiding. “I know, I’m sorry. I’ve got a lot going on.”

“Hm. Too busy for your ol’ man. I see how it is.”

I rubbed the top of my wet head, pacing my bedroom. “No sir. It’s just been…”

Hard.

Tough.

Exhausting.

I wanted to share it all with him, but the lump in my throat would never let me. I disguised my fear with a terse cough. “How’s Ma? Put her on.”

A moment of painful silence passed before my father decided to postpone my ass chewing. “Hold on.”

Thank f*ck.

They were good parents.

I was just a shitty son.

“Cannon?”

“Hey Ma.”

I could see her now, standing there in her flannel shirt and Levis staring at the ceiling, thanking the good Lord above I was ok. “Well it’s about time. I’ve been worried sick.”

“Sorry, Ma.” There was no excuse I could give my mother that would justify ignoring their calls and texts for the last several days, so I didn’t even try. “What’s goin’ on around there?”

“You mean aside from worrying sick about our son? We’ve been planning your sister’s wedding. Noble is just about to drive me crazy. I swear she’s a certified bridezilla. And Battle is, well…that boy is about as stubborn as you are. He misses his big brother. We all miss you so much, baby. You’re still coming home next month for the wedding right?”