Torrent of Tears (Scourge Survivor Series Book 3)(4)

“No thanks. I appreciate it, but I’ve really got to get to class.” I gripped the banister and continued our ascent.

He bounced up the stairs beside me, keeping pace with no effort. “How will you get through two hours of advanced weapons training if you can’t climb the stairs to get to the gym? Do you honestly think you can swing a flail right now?”

Gods, I should’ve pulled the covers over my head and stayed in bed.

“Come here.” Nash grabbed my shoulder and steered me into the fifth year’s co-ed bathroom. I got a handle on myself while one of Jade’s students finished washing up. After she left, Nash checked the stalls to ensure our privacy. “I’m not trying to coerce you, Lexi. Really, I’m not, but you look like roadkill. I want to help.”

“I appreciate it, but I could get into a lot of trouble—”

He slipped his hand into his jacket and came out with a small package that looked like gum.

“What’s that?”

“It’s new . . . for those who don’t smoke.” He pulled out a few sticks of the Haze gum and handed them to me. “No one will know it’s not a stick of gum. I’m just not sure how much you’d need. You’re tiny, but I sit across from you at dinner. You have the metabolism of a barbarian.”

“I don’t know whether that should piss me off or not.”

The three-minute chime sounded and without thinking any more about it, I unwrapped a stick of Haze and drove it in my mouth. Nash shoved the rest of the package into the pocket of my battle vest and—gods help me—it was done.



The day passed in a blissful golden blur of conversation, melee practice, and bacchanalia party preparation. I hadn’t realized the oppressive grip my suffering had held me under, but with the pain lifted, I was in top form and ready for anything. I decided, after wadding in a third piece of groovy gum, that I’d name my first-born child Nash. It was catchy and I had a new-found love for that guy. I really did.

Sliding sideways past the boxes and bins stacked and blocking most of the main entrance hall of the Gatehouse, I hung my winter jacket on a hook and made my way inside to find Julian. Hopefully he was back to being the brother who didn’t want to kill me.

“Yo bro,” I called, turning the corner into the main control room. Three heads whirled around and not one of my siblings looked too thrilled that I had crashed their convo. I stopped short in the open doorway feeling like I’d just taken a blow to the gut. “What’s this . . . a party and me the only one without an invite?”

Jade shook her head and her long burgundy locks danced against her chest. Funny thing about redheads, their blush always gave away when they lied. “Don’t look so suspicious, Lexi, there’s no conspiracy. Reign asked me to connect with the sea otter Finfolk off the coast of Alaska. You remember Storm right? The Native girl from the Hearthstone last spring? Well, she’s running the clan now. Bruin and I just got back and were catching up with Julian on the Scourge front.”

Bruin stood arms crossed, his turquoise stare solidly fixed on the monitor wall behind me. No change there.

My stomach tightened at the awkwardness choking the air. Stepping further into the room, I picked up the tablet Julian used to track deliveries and scrolled through the list. “I was told that some of my party supplies arrived.”

“Some?” Julian scrubbed rough fingers over his skull-trimmed afro and scowled. “Is there more to come? You’re five times over your yearly quota for Modern Realm deliveries and it’s only February, Lexi. You’ve brought so much through the Athen’s Gatehouse, I’m going to have to declare it a point of exposure risk.”

“Yeah, right.” I snorted. “No one’s keeping tabs on deliveries made to an olive oil factory. Besides, I want my bacchanalia to be authentic. I need everything I ordered to make it special.”

Julian shook his head, his mint-green gaze stern. “I get that you think so, but no party is worth risking realm safety.”

“Well sorry if my birthday doesn’t rank up there with Jade and Galan ordering half a baby supply warehouse or Bruin sending for everything Mika ever owned in Vancouver. I’ll try to remember my place.”

“Don’t be petty, Lexi,” Jade snapped. “We’re worried about you.”

I whirled, my mouth agape. “Worried? You’ve each been so busy excluding me from your lives I wouldn’t have thought you’d have time to spare a thought for me.”

Bruin growled and threw up his hands. “I told you it was useless. She’s too selfish to hear anything we say.”

“Selfish?” I spat. “Don’t even pretend that you’re mad about twinkle lights and statuary, Bear. I’ve apologized a thousand times for Mika. I’ve tried to make amends, but you and your mate won’t even open the door for me.”

“Stop apologizing and accept responsibility for it,” he growled. “It was an accident you’ve said. You didn’t mean it, you’ve said. Fuck, Lexi, actions have consequences. You hurt the people around you and don’t even see it until they’re bleeding and Jade has to patch them up.”

I fought the urge to leave. It would only give him the satisfaction of saying I acted like a child. “Bruin, you know damned well I never meant to hurt her. Sometimes my strength gets away from me—especially if I’m provoked.”