Love's Suicide (Love's Suicide #1)(9)

I found him lying on his bed, throwing a ball at the wall and catching it. I avoided sitting next to him and chose to stand. “Can we talk? I think you misunderstood me back there.”

“I didn’t misunderstand anything, Kat. I get that you want me out of the way. Trust me, I want to get the f*ck away from you and my brother too.”

“That’s not true and you know it. Why are you saying things like that?” I knew I said I wouldn’t sit down, but I couldn’t help it. My ass hit the bed and I turned to face him. “We would never cut you out of our lives. How could you even think that?”

He stopped tossing the ball and looked at me. “Do you love my brother?”

I gave him a flip kind of look. “What? Why would you ask me that? You know I do.”

“Yeah. He loves you, too. Don’t you get it? I can’t sit around here while you two are planning this fantastic life together. I’m drowning in your f*cking happiness.”

“Don’t say it like that. We’d never push you away. It isn’t like we’re broadcasting ourselves. We hang out just like we used to.”

“It’s different, even if you don’t see it. As far as pushing me away, well, you don’t have to, Kat. I’m the one walking away.” I used to love when he called me Kat, but this time it was different. It was his way of telling me to drop it.

“I don’t want you to go.”

He laughed. “Did my brother send you up here, or did you come by yourself?”

I shrugged. “Both.”

He shook his head like he was disappointed. “Just go back downstairs. I’m not going to waste my time explaining and I’ve already signed everything. I’ll be eighteen and able to leave on my own free will. You and Branch can go off to college and ride into the sunset on your white stallion for all I care.”

I was sobbing silently while my lips trembled. “That’s not fair. Why are you being so mean to me?”

He sat up and pointed toward his door. “Kat, we’re friends, even family. I didn’t do this to hurt you. Get it through your head and get out of my room.”

“You’re hurting me right now, Brooks. I don’t understand what I ever did to you to make you treat me this way. You used to protect me.”

“I used to do a lot of things and it got me nowhere.”

I leaned over and closed my eyes as my lips got close to his ear. I could smell that his cologne was different from his brothers. It was sweeter, like I’d always remembered. “I don’t want to lose you.”

He grabbed my arm and kept me facing him. My eyes shot open and were close enough to feel each other’s breath on our faces. “Why? Say it, Kat. Tell me what we both already know.”

I should have been honest as some desperate plea to keep him near me. It would have been so wrong, but I couldn’t stand imagining him not being my friend. In that very moment I knew I loved him so much more than I should have.

Instead of saying it, I pulled away from him. “I’m not saying anything.”

I got up and started walking out of the room, when he said, “Yeah, that’s what I figured.”

I didn’t go back downstairs to hang out with Branch. After shutting my bedroom door, I fell onto my bed and cried harder than I had the day before. Brooks was breaking my heart, and I couldn’t tell anyone about it, because I’d lose Branch, whom I equally loved. How I’d let myself fall for two brothers was beyond me.

I knew I had to let Brooks go if I wanted to have a future with Branch. After all, I couldn’t have both of them, and I knew it.





Chapter 4


June 2007


“Congratulations you three. How about you all stand together for a picture?” Danica was making us take a million pictures after the ceremony had ended. Thankfully it was a sunny day outside and the weather wasn’t too hot.

We’d all managed to graduate from our little private school and the big world was out there waiting for us.

As for me and Branch, we’d be attending school at Salisbury State University in Maryland. It was about two hours from home, but close enough to visit when we wanted to.

Brooks was another story altogether. He was ordered to report for boot camp two days after graduation.

Danica and Walt had flown in both sets of their parents and invited everyone over for a joint graduation-going away party. It was nice for them to see their grandparents since they all lived in Florida. Every year we visited for vacation, but I knew they wanted to be a part of the twins becoming adults.

I was grateful to already be included in the family that I would one day call my in-laws. I’d never have to worry about meeting them or have them end up hating me. They’d known me since birth and loved me as if I was their daughter for all that time.

The grandparents were the same. They all gave me gifts for my birthday and holidays and never treated me like I didn’t belong. For graduation one set of them gave each of us five hundred bucks. Branch and I would use ours toward expenses while attending school. We knew we’d have to get jobs, but that would only get us started without having to depend on his parents.

The morning of the party, Brooks stayed in his room. I’d helped Danica decorate and make breakfast for all of our guests. When he didn’t come down to eat, I took a plate up to his room. I knocked three times before opening the door and finding him lying on his back, shirtless. “Hey, I brought you food.”