The Bride (The Bride #1)(10)

Right. Because we had one court, one judge, and he had way more important stuff to do.

Like traffic tickets and parking violations.

There was no point in putting it off, though. This was what I had to do.

I walked over to the door and opened it. Howard gave me a weak smile. No compliments, no anything. He started walking and I followed him through the hall into the open courtroom. There were a few people in the benches, waiting for their turn at whatever.

Jake was standing in front of the judge’s desk.

Judge Michaels, who had made this all possible, was wearing jeans and a chambray shirt. He didn’t do the whole robe thing, which was a little anticlimactic. A looming judge in a black robe might have been more ominous.

Because that’s what this felt like. More like a sentencing than a wedding.

I ran through my options again.

Foster home.

Running away.

Or Jake.

Jake gave me a chin nod and I guessed that meant he was okay with everything. He was clearly my best option. If only we didn’t have to be married.

Finally I shuffled toward him and stood next him. He was actually way taller than I was. My head only came up to his shoulder. I guess I hadn’t realized that. Jake was the type of a guy a woman could wear high heels with if she had them. Which I didn’t.

“You okay?” he asked me.

I nodded, but the truth was I felt nauseous. That would make for some interesting wedding photos. Me puking on Jake’s cowboy boots.

He was wearing his suit that he’d worn to Dad’s funeral. Same suit he’d worn to his own father’s funeral. His only suit. What if he wore it to his next wedding? That would be too awful. I would have to tell him that. Do not marry Janet in the same suit you married me in. I knew instinctively Janet would not like that.

“Is everyone ready?” the judge asked us.

I nodded. I could see Jake nod out of my peripheral vision because I didn’t want to look at him directly. I didn’t want to watch him as he made this sacrifice and essentially gave away a year and four months of his life.

For me.

“You don’t have to do this,” I blurted out. I turned to him but kept my head down. “I’ll go to the foster home. It’s only a year and…”

His hand was under my chin, lifting my face, forcing me to look at him. Until I reached his eyes. Those eyes, which I had known for as long as I could remember, told me everything.

“We got this,” he said.

“You’re sure?”

“Yep.”

“I’m going to be your wife.” I know I made a face at the word wife.

“You’re going to be my family. Legally. That means I can protect you. Legally. That’s all we’re doing today.”

“Right.” It was no big deal.

“We’re ready, Judge,” Jake said. Then he took my hand.

“Hookay,” I breathed out. “Let’s get hitched.”

It was short and simple.

Do you?

Yes.

Do you?

Yep.

By the powers invested in the judge by the state of Montana, we were legally a family.

But then the judge said it. The kiss the bride part. Probably out of habit. It wasn’t like he was trying to be lurid or anything. Jake turned and kissed my forehead right in the center.

My dad used to do that. Whenever I was the most upset. Screaming or carrying on about anything. Crying. It didn’t matter. He would hold me by the shoulders until I calmed down, and then kiss my forehead.

He was never going to do that again. He wasn’t just gone. He was dead.

He was dead and he wasn’t coming back ever. I was never going to talk to him or hug him again. I was never going to hear his voice when he called my name. He wasn’t going to be at my real wedding. I wasn’t going to dance with him. He wasn’t going to know my kids.

I could feel this horrible ugly thing rolling around inside me. Like all the air and blood and guts had suddenly been sucked out of me. I was breathing and my lip was wobbling and I couldn’t think hard enough to stop any of it.

“Ellie…”

I was holding on to Jake’s forearms. Squeezing them as hard as I could to stay standing.

“My dad is dead,” I sputtered out even as I felt the tears start pouring out of me. Except I didn’t want to do this here. Not in front of Howard and his secretary, Sue Anne.

Not in front of Jake, because he might think I was weak and he wouldn’t want to be married to a weak person. But I couldn’t stop it. “He’s….really dead…”

As if everyone around me didn’t know that. As if I was offering up new information. They all KNEW. They knew he was dead and they knew I was going to feel this way but none of them told me.

“I can’t… I can’t… breathe.”

I was trying to draw in breaths but the sobs kept pushing them out. I felt snot running down over my lip and I wanted to run away. Only I knew the second I let go of Jake, it was going to happen.

I was going to fall.

I was going to faint.

Maybe I should let it happen.

The next thing I knew, Jake was bending around me and suddenly I was being carried in his arms. I was no little girl anymore, but this was a man who handled calving season like they were kittens being born. My weight probably barely registered with him.