My So-Called Sex Life (How to Date, #1)(9)



“Yes!”

“All right. Here you go,” he says, holding up his hands like he’s saying you asked for it. “Some of my heroes have a thing for guys with British accents.” He finishes with a wink.

I pat his shoulder. “Gee, I always wondered where that came from,” I say dryly. His husband is an Oscar-nommed English actor, and TJ was in love with him from afar for years before they got back together.

Melissa points to me. “What about you, Hazel?”

“Of course I love English accents too,” I say, but that’s a chicken’s answer.

There are so many ways to answer this truthfully. Many of my heroines are terrified of true romance. They’re scared to pieces of getting hurt. They don’t trust love. And they’re convinced they choose badly.

Well, just look at their track records of terrible exes.

But no one wants to hear that on a panel. Or, honestly, at all.

Quickly, I cycle through the details I’d be willing to dole out.

Do I tell Melissa I like to shop at thrift stores? And that yes, one time I did in fact make out in the dressing room with a hot guy I met at Champagne Taste, inspiring a scene in Sweet Spot? Or that at another time, my phone decided to spill all my secrets when it acted like an asshole and began playing a dictation file of mine while I was on the subway?

Yeah, that was a good one.

“Melissa,” I say, leaning closer, even though she’s many feet away, then I reveal a little behind-the-scenes detail. “Remember when Colby’s audiobook started playing at the silent auction?”

Melissa’s jaw drops, then she closes it to speak, a little awed. “Right during the get on your knees, pretty baby, and take it deep scene in Plays Well With Others?”

“That’s the one,” I say, then I shrug, owning my foible and the inspiration it provided. “Happened to me while I was on the subway one afternoon. Only it was with the dictation file for a sex scene I had spoken into my phone earlier that day,” I say, giving them a little piece of me—the piece I’m willing to share. The one that makes me seem human. But never too human, never too raw, never too wounded.

This is just enough, I hope.

And enough works, since laughter ripples through the crowd, then Luciana chimes in with, “Show of hands. Has that happened to you with your audiobook?”

Hands fly high.

A throat clears from right next to me. “Hazel, are you leaving out an important detail?”

Tension slams into me from Axel’s question. Is he going to dress me down onstage? “What do you mean?” I ask carefully.

He shoots a c’mon smile. “Tell them the rest of the story.”

Shit. Fuck. What am I leaving out? Dread crawls along my skin. I part my lips, but I’ve got nothing to say.

Only, he does. “That happened when you were on the subway at three-thirty, and it was filled with school children.”

I breathe a thousand and one sighs of relief.

But I’m also shocked. I’d nearly forgotten that detail.

I stare at him, a little amazed he remembers that. He wasn’t even with me on the train that afternoon a few years ago. Now that he’s mentioned it though, I must have told him the story the next day. Maybe when we were plotting our second forbidden romance in the Ten Park Avenue series. I told him all the little details of my days then—like the woman who walked her German shepherd past my apartment each morning as I was leaving for my run. Soon, she started wearing the same color workout clothes as I wore. We decided she was trying to steal my identity, so we called her The Hacker, and I wrote her nickname on my whiteboard.

I blink away the fond memory then focus on the here and now. There’s little an audience loves more than an embarrassing tale, so I pick up the conversational baton as smoothly as I can. “And if you think having a sex scene from an audiobook play out loud is bad, imagine if it’s you dictating a rough version of the sex scene,” I say.

Axel fake coughs. “And it was…very rough.”

Holy fuck.

Axel is a fantastic faker. He’s got the whole poke and prod playfully down to an art.

I better up my game. “That’s what she said,” I add, and the crowd pretty much goes wild.

But it’s time for the Axel and Hazel show to end. That’s the point, after all—we don’t want to hog the limelight.

“What about you, Saanvi?” I ask, helping steer the question to the others.

She answers with a comment about how she’s always been drawn to bad boys, like her heroes and heroines are. After Mateo and Kennedy answer too, Luciana strolls to the edge of the stage, picking a new audience member.

A question about what everyone’s working on next keeps the focus on the others, and when I steal a glance at the time, I want to pump a fist.

We only have fifteen minutes left of this Q and A, and we’ve been pulling this off.

Soon enough the clock winds down, and Luciana wraps up the session, thanking the audience. “And don’t forget, these authors will be signing books starting in thirty minutes at the publishers’ booths, so get your paperbacks ready.”

It’s clear the session’s over, but a strong, brash voice pipes up from the front row.

“But Axel never answered the question,” a woman with purple hair points out. She stands, grabs the nearest audience mic. She looks familiar, and I’m pretty sure I’ve seen her face on my social media feeds. She’s a popular BookToker who’s made a mark for being provocative. “About what part of him he puts into his books.”

Lauren Blakely's Books