This Is What Happy Looks Like(2)



Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:33 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Busted.

No, I’m only seventeen, which I think lands me pretty solidly outside of creepy-old-man territory.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:38 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Fair enough. Though, unfortunately, I’m still not available to walk Wilbur tonight. And even if I was, you’d probably have to find someone a little bit closer, since I doubt you live anywhere near me.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:39 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

How do you know?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:40 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

I’m from Middle-of-Nowhere, Maine.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:42 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Oh, then I guess you’re right. I’m from Middle-of-Everything, California.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:43 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Lucky duck.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:44 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Lucky pig, actually.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:48 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Right! Hey, weren’t you running behind with something?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:51 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Yeah, I should probably be getting back to it…

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:55 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Okay. Nice talking to you. And sorry I couldn’t come through for Wilbur.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:57 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

He’ll forgive you, I’m sure. He’s a very magnanimous pig.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:58 PM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

I’m relieved to hear that.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:01 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Hey, E?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:02 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Yes… G?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:03 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

What if I e-mail you again tomorrow?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:04 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

I don’t know. I’m not exactly in the habit of trolling the Internet for pen pals…

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:05 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

But?

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:07 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

But I’m also terrible at good-byes.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:08 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Okay then. I’ll just say hello again instead.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:09 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

I like that better. And I’ll say: Good morning!

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:10 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

But it’s not morning…

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:12 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

It is in Maine.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:13 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Ah, right. Then: Howdy!

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:14 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

How very western of you. Greetings!

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:15 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

Are you an alien invader? Ni hao.

From: [email protected]

Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:17 AM

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: (no subject)

You definitely just looked that one up.

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