The Crush (3)

Someone who looked at me like I was important—not because of what I could do. Adaline Wilder looked at me that way because she liked me. Me. Not Emmett Ward, the football player. Not Emmett Ward—son of the legendary player and coach.

She liked me. More than liked me, at the time. And I hadn’t given us a chance to see what that could become. It would’ve been something, of that I’d always been sure. Because I liked her too. But sitting in the hospital waiting room, with that inkling of an idea tugging at the back of my mind, I started realizing the enormity of what that something could have become.

Back then, there was no way for me to see it. But I did now.

It would have been the start of a life. One step forward with her, all those years ago, and it would have snapped something foundational into place.

I’d never built her anything out of pink Legos, but suddenly, I wanted that more than anything in the entire world.

“What the absolute hell are you doing?” a voice asked from behind me.

“Parker!” Gabriela exclaimed. She scrambled out of my lap and jumped at my teammate for a big hug.

“How you doing, half pint?” he asked.

She giggled. “Emmett is building me a castle.”

“Emmett is a notorious show-off,” he said easily.

I rolled my eyes.

G laughed, then asked to be put down. She ran over by her mom, clinging to her leg. Parker took the seat next to me, his long legs sprawled out in front of him as he eyed the half-built castle. “It’s … nice.”

“It’s not done, asshole.” I gave him a look. “You do press?”

“Just one interview and I started feeling twitchy about not getting over here. I showered, talked to Coach, and then headed out. A few other guys should be on their way shortly.”

I scratched the side of my face. “Coach ticked that I bailed?”

“You’re the golden boy. You could piss on his car, and he’d probably give you a raise.”

“Doubtful.”

Parker’s face went serious. “Any update?”

I passed along what Rebecca told me, and he digested that with a solemn expression. “Damn.”

“Yeah. I keep thinking about how she must feel.”

Parker made a noise of agreement. “You looked pretty spaced out when I walked up. Is that where you went?”

I could’ve lied to him. But that seed of an idea, that thing I couldn’t quite hold on to in the back of my head, had cleared up quite substantially.

That’s why I turned to face him. “I was thinking about your sister, actually.”

Parker laughed at first. Then he looked at my face, and the smile died. “Oh shit, Emmett. Adaline?”

With a sigh, I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I know. She’s dating what’s-his-face.”

“Nick Sullivan.” He let out a deep breath. “He does have a name, and you’ve known it all four years they’ve been together.”

Was that an annoyed growl building in my chest? Maybe. I swallowed it down because I had no right to feel jealous of him.

Adaline met someone else.

Because I told her I didn’t want to start a relationship with her. With anyone, really. But she’d been the one asking the night before the draft.

A year earlier, and I probably would’ve kissed her when she told me how she felt. Six months earlier, even. When the looming landscape of my future hadn’t been so imminent. Maybe we would’ve been here together, with a little girl a couple of years younger than G.

I rubbed at my chest, that out-of-control feeling spreading like a thorny vine.

“I honestly don’t know if I should be asking this because it’s my sister,” Parker said. “But what exactly are you thinking?”

I sat forward, clasping my hands between my legs. “I don’t know, Parker. Something about being here. It’s screwing with my head.”

He was quiet for a moment. “I get it, man. We all do.”

I wasn’t sure he did, though. All the fleeting thoughts of Adaline over the years … if I’d catch a glimpse of her picture somewhere or wonder if she was at our game once Parker joined me in Ft. Lauderdale a couple of seasons earlier, it was like they all melted together into one giant hulking thing that I couldn’t ignore for much longer.

“It’s not about having just anyone, Parker,” I said quietly. My hand had stopped trembling, and once the back towers were complete, I laid the foundation for another battlement extending out the side. “The only time I’ve ever considered placing something alongside football in my life was her. It scared the shit out of me because the next day, I was walking into a draft that would decide my entire future in this league. It felt … impossible to balance the two.”

“Fucking hell, Ward,” Parker grumbled. “Leave it to you to have some life-changing epiphany five years after you had your chance with someone. You are, without a doubt, the smartest dumbass I’ve ever met in my life.”

I laughed, the sound completely devoid of humor. “Trust me, I know how stupid this is. She has Nick.” I said the word with so much venom that Parker shook his head. “Nick and his record-breaking contract that’s moving him to … where is it? New York? Which means she’ll probably go with him.”

Parker mimicked my posture, and when he took a long, deep, very dramatic inhale, followed by the longest exhale in the entire world, I wanted to punch him. Of course, she was going with him. They’d been dating for four years.